THE OL' B!T*H IS BACK for Redemption.

I can finally sit and write with out the pressure of who is reading or judging. For someone who talked to several people on a daily basis to now talking a one or two you can say that changes have happened in a year. I learned that just because I meet them I don't have to like them - (.) or keep them. This is great to know as I plan to be 100% back on #MyRide.

If you have followed me or my journey, thus far,  then you have become accustom to life for me and the abrupt start/stops that I have had plenty of. In fact the last time I wrote . on this blog, was when I was boasting about giving up on one of the pleasures I had in life, traveling in my motor home, to move to Alabama. Well that lasted a month.

In fact because I do in fact live in my motor home and travel it would appear that I'm one of the most disconnected people on the planet. That is one of the most untrue statements. or possible assumptions. My head works and obsess about everything and wonder what someone else will…

Let Me Hear Ya' Sang - Sweet Home Alabama

Some of you know just how spoiled by life I really am. During my travels the last few years I have really started to listen. Not just to others but to the universe and to life and more important my body. The last few months I have really been asking for change and a ton of searching has been done. I feel like I am some kind of shedding animal, layers and layers just seem to fall off.

One thing I have learned in the past few years jumping from place to place is I have done it all. Everything I have ever dreamed up and everything I have ever wanted to be professionally I have done.

The last few years has been one freaking reset button but this time it's professionally. I finally got me right. I am personally confident.  I see how important life is. Plus I have been watching Grey Anatomy on Netflix and I know how much shorter it is too.  - HA - Any Way.

 I know how much fun the last few years have been for the last few weeks feel so off that I am going to hit the professional rest bu…

When in Colorado, just inhale.

It was a twelve hour drive from Tulsa Oklahoma to get to Crestone Colorado.  I saw a ton of empty fields and miles and miles of nothing but flat stretches of nothing. I saw a couple dust funnels and several large, very large tractors and such. As I drove the never ending highway 412 West through the never ending Oklahoma panhandle I was eagerly waiting for those mountains. The hills with no point. 

Finally there they were! It took my breath when I saw them. I was on the phone when I came upon them for the fist time. I couldn't continue the conversation I was having. I was speechless. I didn't hang up the phone tho. I did explain I was having a moment. The lady I was on the phone with kinda pick up on what was happening and gave my moment a more powerful message and it was from and about God. Her faith is very strong and she has been a staple in my journey #WESTBY2021. Oh yeah and BTW no pictures of the mountains either.

I continued my trip. My cell services was spotty. So was …

Death is so, final!

I'm now in my late 40's , still looking 29 tho, and just a few short days ago I was setting in a church where I once sang songs. My Dad, My Aunt Shelia and My Aunt Connie sat on the bench in front of me. It was Mamaw Sue's Funeral at Lower Chilhowee Baptist Church.  Once I sang there as a kid with a RadioShack speaker and a microphone. The 35 to 50 people that was attending church that night for me was a huge audience, back then. Back at the funeral I was reminded  of just who the fuck I was. I saw with my own eyes those things from my childhood that sent me where I am today - again.
The change for me is living. I was reminded of how I never wanted to live back then, i thought. My humor was to cover pain, i was aware of it but didn't "know" I had it, it seemed so normal then. Hell it wasn't pain. It was confusion. Still is. I have no pain. I have emotions and feelings - they are so freaking strong that I obsess.
I look in the mirror  and I freak out. I am…

This balance crap is unstable for me.

The irony in all this stuff I am trying to do is really striving to be TheRealTazCable. I don't know that I have ever been "real". I wish I could write like I am in the middle of a crowd with a couple cocktails in me. I guess I have so much going through my head that I feel like I am not being honest with everyone. Realistically my humor is honest, brutal sometimes and usually things that most people can't get away with, ever saying or doing. I am not sure why its that way. I guess I am just blessed and if writing is something that I want to do I better get use to being honest and deliver it the same way as I do in person.
I recently met a jewelry maker who was fluent in crystals and stone. I ask her to make me a bracelet that would give me Emotional Detachment. See that car I was waiting for that day in my last post in  Panacea turns out, I was driving it all along. I was the one I was waiting on.  So she defined that to mean - balance.
Balance is a word that I have …

Thanks For The Reminder Ochlocknee Bay

What an emotional reminder it has been. It seems that I just arrived for a shower and WiFi just a few short days ago but its been a couple months.
Wakulla County, Florida and they call it Will-Kill-Ya County and a few short days ago sitting road side in a bar I thought I was dying.
You see, I just came for a shower and WiFi and I have met some wonderful people. Explored some wonderful opportunities for myself.
I met Jasmine McMillan from the Holiday Campground. She has been nothing but my biggest cheerleader since I pulled in her driveway. I jumped out of the Wander Wagon ran into the office and said "Don't worry I'm not staying." Because the Wander Wagon looked so poorly. Jasmine was instrumental in me getting The Wander Wagon Too and that alone has changed this journey for me single handed.
The sweetest most adorable person I have ever met in my life works with Jasmine in the campground office and she is my Mean Jean and she is not even close to mean. Don't pis…

Looking for a place to me.

Ok so I have 500 thousand, not really that many, posts and I have been looking for a way to address this.  This blog topic. Or Subject. I am starting to realize that I have a platform and it's not made up of those that I get influence from. My friend back in Palm Harbor does read my blog and I do listen to her, as long as she hasn't had too much wine - then you HAVE to listen to her. I have friends back home that I speak to all the time and I "let them listen to me". In quotes because that is really what happens when I talk to them but they do give feed back - but they don't read my blog.
My life long friend tells me that she don't wanna hear about my drama - not really did she say that - in my blog she wants to hear about my travel. Well, I don't think she reads my blog.

I guess this is a double feature because as I feel I need to explain somethings as I travel to look for a place to be me - my blog and my writing has been looking for the same answer.